Thursday, June 12, 2003
Copyright © Las Vegas Mercury

Film shorts

Agent Cody Banks

2 stars (PG, 95 min.) Frankie Muniz (Big Fat Liar) again fails to achieve big-screen stardom as a miniature 007 trained by the CIA. Harald Zwart's sad Spy Kids/James Bond hybrid completely lacks humor and stylistic charm.--BG

Anger Management

1/2 star (PG-13, 101 min.) Adam Sandler is sentenced to anger therapy with a patently certifiable Jack Nicholson. Cue sophomoric jokes. Director Peter Segal isn't mediocre; a mess of this magnitude requires total incompetence.--JC

Bend It Like Beckham

1 star (PG-13, 112 min.) It's "My big formulaic Sikh soccer romance." Parminder Nagra ignores sister Archie Panjabi's wedding preparations to join a soccer team coached by hunk Jonathan Rhys-Meyers. Gurinda Chadha's feel-good mix of sports flick and culture-clash satire is the painful epitome of "crowd-pleaser." With Keira Knightley.--AA

The Bread, My Sweet

1/2 star (NR, 105 min.) Scott Baio plays a Pittsburgh corporate raider-cum-pastry chef. Mauling our heartstrings with unsurpassed tackiness, Melissa Martin's debut is a cannoli stuffed with painful ethnic stereotypes and some of the worst dialogue ever.--JC

Bruce Almighty

3 stars (PG-13, 101 min.) When TV reporter Jim Carrey rails at God (Morgan Freeman), the indulgent deity endows him with his powers. Tom Shadyac (Liar Liar) hasn't crafted a Capraesque masterpiece. But although Jennifer Aniston's comedic talents are wasted, the film is undeniably sweet and poignant.--TM

Chicago

4 stars (PG-13, 113 min.) Renee Zellweger, Catherine Zeta-Jones and Richard Gere might not be stage ready, but they shine In Rob Marshall's film of the Bob Fosse musical. Maybe too slick and tidy, but always entertaining. 6 Oscars incl. picture, supporting actress Zeta-Jones.--MP

Cowboy Bebop: The Movie

3 stars (R, 115 min.) Co-director Shinichiro Watanabe panders to his devoted fan base, with this anime adaptation of the beloved TV show/graphic novels, by not changing a thing. An engrossing, timely Halloween tale about the threat of SARS-esque bioterrorism and the evils of the pharmaceutical industry, investigated by the ragtag Bebop bounty crew. The juxtaposition between the familiar and the otherworldly validates the franchise's endurance.--MP

Daddy Day Care

2 stars (PG, 93 min.) Steve Carr's formulaic Mr. Mom ripoff wastes the talents of Eddie Murphy, Anjelica Huston and Steve Zahn. Have a snack and a nap instead.--TM

The Dancer Upstairs

4 stars (R, 135 min.) Adapted by Nicholas Shakespeare from his own novel, John Malkovich's directorial debut is a stylish, sensual film about love, loyalty and the difficulty of remaining honest in dishonest times. Javier Bardem is magnificent as a Latin American cop tracking an elusive revolutionary leader, who's increasingly attracted to his daughter's enigmatic ballet teacher (Laura Morante). Alternately elegant and electrifying.--JC

Down with Love

3 stars (PG-13, 98 min.) Womanizer Ewan McGregor pursues proto-feminist '60s writer Renee Zellweger in Peyton Reed's pastiche of Doris Day/Rock Hudson sex comedies (Pillow Talk, Lover Come Back). With Eve Ahlert and Dennis Drake's witty script, Reed has fun re-creating antediluvian filmmaking techniques, David Hyde Pierce steals the show in the Tony Randall sidekick role, and Randall himself has a crowd-pleasing cameo.--AA

Finding Nemo

3 stars (G, 104 min.) Andrew Stanton's digitally animated feature is a visual comic delight about a single father's struggle to let his child take risks. Neurotic clownfish Albert Brooks searches for son Alexander Gould, "fishnapped" by an Australian dentist. Pixar's animators have designed a magnificent blend of the real and fantastic, with memory impaired Ellen DeGeneres, tough guy Willem Dafoe, shark Barry Humphries, pelican Geoffrey Rush and sea turtle Stanton. Plus exec producer John Lasseter's charming 1989 short Knick Knack.--TM

The Good Thief

4 stars (R, 109 min.) Neil Jordan's big bet (remaking Jean-Pierre Melville's Bob le flambeur) pays off, thanks to granite-faced Nick Nolte as a junkie who joins Gerard Darmon's scheme to rob a Monaco casino. Only marred by weird editing (distracting freeze frames) and zero chemistry between Nolte and love interest Nutsa Kukhianidze. With Ralph Fiennes, Tcheky Karyo.--AA

Grand Canyon: The Hidden Secrets

2 stars (NR, 40 min.) Kieth Merrill's 1984 Imax movie mixes spectacular footage with a brief history lesson about early explorers John Wesley Powell and Garcia de Cardenas.--AA

Haunted Castle

Not reviewed (PG, 38 min.) Aspiring rock star Jasper Steverlinck visits dead mom's spooky English mansion and learns that rock 'n' roll really is the devil's music, in this 2001 3-D Imax horror flick from Belgian director Ben Stassen.--AA

Holes

3 1/2 stars (PG, 117 min.) Shia LeBeouf digs holes at a Texas juvenile detention camp run by Sigourney Weaver and Jon Voight. Andrew Davis brings Louis Sachar's teen novel to the screen with its teasing plot and sardonic humor miraculously intact. With Patricia Arquette, Eartha Kitt.--AA

Identity

1 1/2 stars (R, 90 min.) John Cusack, Ray Liotta, Amanda Peet and seven other dimwits check into a lonely Nevada motel during a thunderstorm, in James Mangold's mangled mix of Psycho with And Then There Were None. With Rebecca DeMornay, Alfred Molina, Pruitt Taylor Vince.--AA

The In-Laws

1 1/2 stars (PG-13, 94 min.) Andrew Fleming's remake of the 1979 Peter Falk/Alan Arkin spy spoof has CIA agent Michael Douglas and neurotic podiatrist Albert Brooks embroiled in international intrigue as their kids prepare to marry. A miserable affair with lame, offensive comedy, disjointed pacing and no chemistry between the leads. Call off this wedding.--TM

Into the Deep

1 1/2 stars (NR, all ages, 35 min.) The Luxor resurrects Howard Hall's 1994 3-D Imax flick, exploring the kelp forests off the California coast, with footage of sea lions, bat rays, jellyfish and opalescent squid having an orgy. Dull narration by Kate Nelligan.--AA

The Italian Job

1 1/2 stars (PG-13, 110 min.) F. Gary Gray's remake of the 1969 caper is a dismal disappointment. After an exciting opening, with Mark Wahlberg and his gang (Edward Norton, Donald Sutherland, Mos Def, Seth Green and Jason Statham) pulling off a cunning bullion heist in Venice, Donna and Wayne Powers' formulaic script has plot twists neither ingenious nor surprising. Wahlberg's scenes with Charlize Theron are as sexy as sump oil, and the climactic car chase, with Minis on Hollywood Blvd., is underwhelming.--AA

Levity

2 stars (R, 100 min.) Ex-felon Billy Bob Thornton romances the sister of the convenience store clerk he killed 22 years earlier. With astonishing energy and no small success, the stars (also including Morgan Freeman as a troubled priest, and Kirsten Dunst as a self-destructive party girl) struggle against writer-director Ed Solomon's good intentions. A majestic failure.--JC

The Lizzie McGuire Movie

1 1/2 stars (PG, 94 min.) Grating Hilary Duff is mistaken for Italian pop star Yani Gellman's partner. Cue Roman Holiday travelogue footage. Only Alex Borstein rescues Jim Fall's Disney Channel spinoff with her contempt for the "mouth-breathing trailer trash" in its audience.--AA

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

5 stars (PG-13, 179 min.) While this reviewer has a few "geek" quibbles, this terrific continuation of Tolkien's grand adventure qualifies as the best film of 2002. Further proof that director Peter Jackson is the right man for the job. With Elijah Wood, Ian McKellen. 2 Oscars: sound editing, visual effects.--GS

The Matrix Reloaded

2 1/2 stars (R, 138 min.) Since the excitable Wachowski brothers delighted us with their vision of a world controlled by a computer program, we've been trembling over the fate of Neo, Trinity and Morpheus (Keanu Reeves, Carrie-Anne Moss and Laurence Fishburne). The sequel shows Andy and Larry going for breadth over depth, adolescent comic-book sex and stretching the familiar fight scenes beyond boredom. The riffs on religion and mythology and college-freshman philosophizing have given way to the sense of a film disappearing in its own computer-coded fakery. With Monica Bellucci, Jada Pinkett Smith, Hugo Weaving.--JC

A Mighty Wind

3 1/2 stars (PG-13, 91 min.) Christopher Guest's folk mockumentary has the Folksmen (Guest, Michael McKean and Harry Shearer) and duo Mitch & Mickey (Eugene Levy and Catherine O'Hara) contending with old issues and newfound obscurity. More believable than you'd expect.--MP

Pokémon Heroes

(G, 80 min.) With the fifth big-screen animated spinoff, Miramax cynically continues to milk the cards/video game phenomenon. Ash, Pikachu and the other insufferable members of the Pokémon gang travel to the waterlogged, Venice-like city of Alto Mare to help siblings Latios and Latias protect the priceless Droplet of the Heart. Directed by Kunihiko Yuyama and Jim Malone. With (the voices of) Veronica Taylor (Ash Ketchum), Eric Stuart (Brock), Rachael Lillis (Misty).

Raising Victor Vargas

4 stars (R, 88 min.) Offering a welcome alternative to the frenzied style of many modern movies, Peter Sollett's gentle film follows the hesitant romance of 16-year-old (Victor Rasuk) and the sloe-eyed siren of the local swimming pool (Judy Marte). A warm, affectionate portrait of lower-class lives, sweet without being cloying, honest without condescending.--JC

2 Fast 2 Furious

1/2 star (PG-13, 107 min.) John Singleton's sequel to The Fast and the Furious continues the "MTV-ization" of culture with its distorted world view. Disgraced cop Paul Walker redeems himself, and ex-con Tyrese, by helping the feds nail drug kingpin Cole Hauser. Tricked-out cars, hedonism and mayhem ensue. Pure carnography, rife with ridiculous replays of adolescent fantasies of fast cars and fast women.--TM

Wrong Turn

Not reviewed (R, 85 min.) When a bunch of teens get lost in the West Virginia woods, they're attacked by cannibal mountain men disfigured through years of inbreeding. Emmanuelle Chriqui (On the Line), Eliza Dushku (City by the Sea) and Jeremy Sisto (Angel Eyes) head the cast of Rob Schmidt's schlock gorefest.

X2: X-Men United

3 stars (PG-13, 135 min.) Bryan Singer's seesaw act in 2000's X-Men (blowing stuff up without dumbing down the film), works in this fairly smart sequel whose narrative parallels our current international travails. After a White House attack by embittered mutant Nightcrawler (Alan Cumming), Xavier (Patrick Stewart) and Magneto (Ian McKellen) unite to stop hawkish Gen. Stryker's (Brian Cox) genocidal plans. With Halle Berry, Hugh Jackman, Famke Janssen, Anna Paquin, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos.--MP

Reviews by: AA: Anthony Allison; BG: Bob Grimm; GS: Geoff Schumacher; JC: Jeannette Catsoulis; MP: Mike Prevatt; TM: Tammy McMahan