Thursday, October 30, 2003
Copyright © Las Vegas Mercury

2 AM: Club Life with Meme Hsu

By Meme Hsu

`Twas the night before Halloween, when all through the Strip

All the creatures were stirring, just to be hip,

The stockings were worn by the hoes and their pimps,

In hopes of finding anything that would make the rest of the world sick.

The lame-ass people were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of sex kittens danced in their heads.

And my girlfriend in lingerie, sitting in my lap,

We had just settled our minds for a hard-ass slap.

When out of the blue there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.

To the VIP host I flew like a flash,

Pulled up my skirt and give a mild flash.

The spotlight on my breast was like new-fallen snow,

Gave naughty thoughts to all the people below.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,

Costume-dressed men with bloody tears.

With horny young men, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment I wanted a lick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:

"Now Devils! Now Nurses! Now Sex Kittens and Vixen!

On Hoes! On Cheerleaders! On, all of you pimpin'!

To the front of the Balcony! To all of the walls!

Now flash away! Flash away! Flash away all!"

And then, in a slap, I felt on my thigh,

The hand of a really hot guy.

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

And laying his hand around my face,

And giving me a kiss.

Away to the exit he headed, nothing else said.

He sprang to his Hummer, to his bros he gave a whistle,

And away they all flew down the Strip.

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,

"Happy Halloween to all, and to all a great fright!"

Fetish/Fantasy? NO! We want Fetish/Reality

Today at OPM, topless disco/tech geisha, DJ Portia Surreal, will be running the house! With music as her lingerie, she captivates a multitude of fans from time zone to time zone with her vision, infinitely marking the galaxy with her essence. Her splendor is a way of life. Her individual synergy is truly a transcending spectacle.

On Halloween, OMP will be featuring Mimi Miyagi, star of Oriental Dolls and Anal Asians. She will be hosting "Night of the Living Dolls Halloween Night" with all of her naughty porn star friends. Women, come dressed in your naughty schoolgirl, nasty nurse or sex kitten costumes and win thousands of dollars in cash and prizes. (OPM, 396-3998)

Bikinis will also be bringing your fantasies to life with three days of sexy Halloween fun. Tonight, Wild 102 FM presents "Lust `Till Dawn." DJ Farrah, from Wild 102, will lead sinister Halloween performances featuring hard-bodied Bikinis beach boys & girls. Free shots for all women, and local women drink for free until 1 a.m. The party will be broadcast live on the radio.

On Halloween night, Bikinis presents "You Naughty Little Devil," featuring hip hop pioneer and world-famous DJ Kid Capri and a $5,000 costume contest. The party will culminate with a sexiest costume contest.

To keep the party going, Bikinis will host "Hedonistic Halloween Pajama & Lingerie Party" on Saturday, Nov. 1. Stop by for a night of fun and be served by Bikinis sexy staff as they show their stuff in a hedonistic array of seductive lingerie. Ladies who wear their lingerie to Bikinis that evening drink for free until midnight. (Bikinis, 777-6582)

Good vs. evil

Halloween night will be sinfully fun at the Palms. It's good vs. evil as Ghostbar hosts the second annual "Angels in the Attic" with DJs Douglas Gibbs and Tino Sanchez. Doors open at 8 p.m.

Adjacent to Ghostbar, Rain in the Desert will host its first "Leather and Lace Gala" starring DJ Homicide of Sugar Ray. Guests can enter Rain's costume contest. First place walks away with $1,000 cash. Second place receives a $500 gift card and third place receives a $250 gift card. Doors open at 10 p.m. Costumes are optional, but highly suggested. (Rain in the Desert, 942-7777)

Licking my lips

Inside one of my favorite restaurants/hotspots, Prana at the Aladdin, Halloween will take a delicious twist as it presents "Show", created by Clique Entertainment. Famous for their connection with Las Vegas talent, performers and Las Vegas' influential set, this is sure to be an incredible event. Independent Film Quarterly Magazine along with Dominique Swain will be hosting the event. (Prana, 650-0507)

Halloween is a ball!

Tonight, Light at the Bellagio will be holding "Bounce Halloween Ball" with DJ Skribble. Attend this party for a scary good time but stay for the frightening spectacles. $1,000 will be given as first prize for most original costume; $1,000 first prize for sexiest costume. (Light, 693-8300)

The 37th Annual Beaux Arts Ball will also be happening tonight at Studio 54. Hosted by DJ Lisa Pittman, the place will be packed with guests dressed in costume all screaming for their chance to win cash prizes totaling $1,800. Categories include: "Best Overall Costume," "Best Drag," "Most Delicious/Sexiest" and "Best Group (three or more people)."

On Saturday, Nov. 1, the party continues as "The Nightmare on 54th Street" encourages patrons to show up in their most daring costumes while dancing among stilt walkers, fetish-crazed fairies, fire-eaters and vampy, gothic vixens. Costume contest prizes totaling $8,000 will be awarded to "Most Original" and "Most Erotically Delicious." (Studio 54, 891-7254)

The House of Blues holds a "Halloween Ball with DJ Tiesto" on Saturday at 10 p.m. This Halloween ball features DJ Tiesto and Bianca Banks. Come dressed in your sexiest and scariest attire for your chance of winning your share of $1,000 in the HOB costume contest. Cover is $40-50. (House of Blues, 632.7600)

Sunday, day of the

living dead

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the clubs, Risque will be holding "The Night After" party. Risque welcomes hardcore clubbers to enjoy the sounds of Hollywood's hottest, DJ-AM and special celebrity guests, to help decimate the Halloween weekend and drive the nails into the coffin. Party hard, because the scariest day of the week, Monday, is right around the corner. (Risque, 946-4589)