Thursday, June 24, 2004
Copyright © Las Vegas Mercury

Film shorts

Adrenaline Rush: The Science of Risk

Not reviewed (NR, 38 min.) Marc Fafard's 2002 Imax movie examines the risks of skydiving and BASE jumping, and includes footage of an experimental jump using a pyramid-shaped parachute based on a 1485 design by Leonardo da Vinci. Filmed in the Mojave Desert, the Florida Keys and the fjords of Norway.--AA

Around the World in 80 Days

1/2 star (PG, 120 min.) Jules Verne continues spinning in his grave as Frank Coraci turns his 1873 novel into a cheesy martial arts flick. Jacke Chan is Passepartout, the valet accompanying Victorian English gentleman Phileas Fogg (Steve Coogan) on his madcap global jaunt. In cameos, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rob Schneider, Luke and Owen Wilson and Kathy Bates all look as embarrassed to be there as baddie Jim Broadbent and unexciting love interest Cécile de France.--AA

Breakin' All the Rules

1 1/2 stars (PG-13, 85 min.) In Daniel Taplitz's flimsy romantic comedy, self-help guru Jamie Foxx inadvertently hooks up with cousin Morris Chestnut's gal (Gabrielle Union). The actors are blissfully indifferent, the film instantly forgettable. With Peter MacNicol.--AA

The Chronicles of Riddick

Zero stars (PG-13, 115 min.) Vin Diesel is in good shape, in David Twohy's science-fiction sequel to Pitch Black. His arms are big. His neck is testosterone-ish. His don't-fuck-with-me expression is still attached. Meanwhile, Thandie Newton's breasts smother her performance. And the great Judi Dench is in it too, but kids won't be impressed: They'll be too busy wishing they could grow up to be as talented as Diesel's pecs.--ADV

Coffee and Cigarettes

2 1/2 stars (R, 96 min.) Jim Jarmusch's 17-year project, 11 varyingly existential and loosely connected black-and-white shorts with actors, musicians and other notable figures (e.g. Tom Waits and Iggy Pop, actors Alfred Molina and Steve Coogan) meeting at various locales, doesn't consistently rouse its players or viewers. The premise trumps the results.--MP

The Day After Tomorrow

2 1/2 stars (PG-13, 123 min.) Brief moments of levity (gringos flee south, VP Kenneth Welsh eats humble pie) almost make Roland Emmerich's disaster pic watchable. Preposterous plot (global warming sparks ice age overnight), awful acting (Dennis Quaid emotes, trying to rescue son Jake Gyllenhaal from NY Public Library) and an onslaught of special effects.--AA

Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story

2 1/2 stars (PG-13, 92 min.) Rawson Marshall Thurber's riotous first feature is as silly and sophomoric as summer comedies come. Professional slacker Vince Vaughn enters a Vegas dodgeball tournament to defend his neighborhood gym from the takeover ambitions of fitness mogul Ben Stiller. Silver-tongued sports commentator Gary Cole steals the show.--AA

Garfield the Movie

1 1/2 stars (PG, 85 min.) Breckin Meyer, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Stephen Tobolowsky are out-acted by the titular fat, computer-generated feline (voiced by Bill Murray). The "plot" of Peter Howitt's shameless exercise in milking Jim Davis' antediluvian comic strip, is only outdone for awfulness by the overacting. But it's almost made bearable by an animated short, Gone Nutty, featuring Ice Age's Scrat.-AA

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

4 stars (PG, 141 min.) Third year challenges for 13-year-old wizard Harry (Daniel Radcliffe) and pals Ron and Hermione (Rupert Grint, Emma Watson) include encountering escapee Gary Oldman, mysterious teacher David Thewlis, imperious professor Alan Rickman, and ditzy divination instructor Emma Thompson. Mexican auteur Alfonso Cuarón and screenwriter Steve Kloves follow the darker turn of J.K. Rowling's third novel, weaving fantasy, horror and humor into a provocative, playful take on teen angst.--TM

Haunted Castle

Not reviewed (PG, 38 min.) Aspiring rock star Jasper Steverlinck visits dead mom's spooky English mansion and learns that rock 'n' roll really is the devil's music, in this 2001 3-D Imax horror flick from Belgian director Ben Stassen.--AA

Hidalgo

1 1/2 stars (PG-13, 136 min.) Joe Johnston's plodding, Middle Eastern horse race saga is jingoistic twaddle. Why are we surprised that Muslim fanatics want to destroy Western civilization? With Viggo Mortensen, Omar Sharif.--AA

Kill Bill Vol. 2

4 stars (R, 136 min.) Quentin Tarantino triumphantly returns. Vol. 1 was the perfect ferocious prologue for this quiet study of love. Amid the waxing philosophical, the Bride (Uma Thurman) continues her quest to kill the murderers of her wedding party (Michael Madsen, Daryl Hannah) and mastermind (mesmerizing David Carradine).--TM

Laws of Attraction

1 1/2 stars (PG-13, 90 min.) Peter Howitt's threadbare romantic comedy has Julianne Moore as a divorce attorney desperately in need of a good briefing, and Pierce Brosnan as the rakish rival happy to oblige. For no apparent reason, other than to drag the cast of Waking Ned Devine from retirement, the couple heads for Ireland. With Frances Fisher, Parker Posey.--JC

Mean Girls

3 stars (PG-13, 97 min.) In Mark Waters' high school satire, Lindsay Lohan attacks glam girl clique, the Plastics (Rachel McAdams, Lacey Chabert, Amanda Seyfried). Tina Fey's adaptation of Rosalind Wiseman's book Queen Bees and Wannabes is entertaining, though formulaic.--AA

NASCAR: The Imax Experience

2 1/2 stars (PG, 48 min.) Simon Wincer's flagrant promo flick is expensive entertainment that requires tiresome 3D glasses to watch. But it delivers some of the visceral, ear-shattering excitement of race day. Narrated by Kiefer Sutherland.--AA

New York Minute

2 stars (PG, 91 min.) While Ashley Olsen delivers a speech, twin sister Mary-Kate tangles with truant officer Eugene Levy. Then the twins get kidnapped. Junk filmmaking, but the storyline charms.--ADV

Ocean Wonderland 3D

Not reviewed (NR, 44 min.) Filmed in the Bahamas and Australia, this Imax doc features rays, sharks, dolphins and other marine life in glorious 3D.--AA

Raising Helen

1 star (PG-13, 117 min.) Hotshot Manhattan agent Kate Hudson inherits three children (Hayden Panettiere, Spencer and Abigail Breslin) and is fired. But in Garry Marshall's world, where issues are reduced to a situation-comedyland mentality, she immediately finds another great job, plus heartthrob John Corbett. With Joan Cusack.--ADV

Saved!

2 1/2 stars (PG-13, 92 min.) At a Christian high school, Jena Malone surrenders her virginity to "cure" her incipiently gay boyfriend, only to end up a pregnant pariah. To escape the self-righteous condemnation of her peers, led by queen-bee Jesus freak Mandy Moore, she cleaves to rebellious punkette Eva Amurri and wheelchair-bound humanist Macaulay Culkin. A biting attack on the religious right or a goodhearted social commentary? Director Brian Dannelly tries to have it both ways.--JC

Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed

2 stars (PG, 85 min.) Fred (Freddie Prinze, Jr.), Daphne (Sarah Michelle Gellar), Velma (Linda Cardellini), Shaggy (Matthew Lillard) and Scooby (Neil Fanning) chase a mastermind monster maker. Raja Gosnell's sequel to his 2002 cartoon spinoff is endearingly goofy.--TM

Shrek 2

3 1/2 stars (PG, 105 min.) The sequel barrels along, with Shrek and Fiona (Mike Myers and Cameron Diaz) returning from honeymoon to Donkey (Eddie Murphy) and an invitation to visit Fiona's parents (John Cleese, Julie Andrews). A maniacal stew of pop culture, mythology, and fairytale characters. Lively, entertaining and quite funny. With inspired Fairy Godmother Jennifer Saunders and show-stealer Antonio Banderas as Puss-in-Boots.--JC

The Stepford Wives

1 1/2 stars (PG-13, 110 min.) Frank Oz's garish, incoherent remake of Bryan Forbes' 1975 film of Ira Levin's dystopian novel--about a pristine suburb where the men have replaced their wives with cleaning- and sex-obsessed robots--replaces the horror with camp and the wit with witlessness. Nicole Kidman is the head of a TV network whose firing becomes an opportunity to bake cupcakes for her neglected husband (Matthew Broderick). The real robots are behind the camera, not in front of it.--JC

Super Size Me

3 1/2 stars (NR, 96 min.) For his exposé, Morgan Spurlock decided to eat nothing but McDonald's for 30 days. He also investigates childhood brainwashing (Happy Meals, Ronald McDonald, in-house playrooms) and school lunch programs packed with empty calories, but fails to address the underlying issues of race and poverty, and the fact that affordability is a consideration.--JC

The Terminal

3 1/2 stars (PG-13, 122 min.) Tom Hanks shines as an Eastern European stranded at a New York airport who learns English, befriends various employees, sets up living quarters in an abandoned gate and, of course, falls in love with flight attendant Catherine Zeta-Jones. This is Steven Speilberg, so some schmaltz creeps through, but Hanks nails the final scenes with understated heroism.--MP

13 Going on 30

1 1/2 stars (PG-13, 98 min.) Teen Christa B. Allen wakes in the body of her older, magazine-editor self (Jennifer Garner). Gary Winick's predictable, retro romance has an insidious moral: a woman's place is firmly in the home. With Kathy Baker, Mark Ruffalo.--AA

Troy

3 stars (R, 163 min.) Cowardly seducer Paris (Orlando Bloom) abducts Helen (Diane Kruger) from husband Menelaus (Brendan Gleeson) and hides behind big brother Hector (Eric Bana). Brad Pitt buffed himself to play warrior Achilles, but isn't enough to support Wolfgang Peterson's production, drowning in $200 million worth of stone, metal and poor digital sequences. Valiant but doomed, as hollow as the Trojan horse itself. With Brian Cox, Peter O'Toole.--JC

Van Helsing

1/2 star (PG-13, 131 min.) Stephen Sommers' witless attempt to blend Dracula, Frankenstein and The Wolf Man with bad CGI effects is a bland, pop-culture stew. Vampire hunter Hugh Jackman and Kate Beckinsale fight Dracula (Richard Roxburgh) and Kate's lupine brother (Will Kemp).--AA

Reviews by: AA: Anthony Allison; ADV: Anthony Del Valle; JC: Jeannette Catsoulis; MP: Mike Prevatt; TM: Tammy McMahan