Rant

There's no sense in complaining about kids in the movie theater during what is essentially a kid movie. They're going to talk and whine and cry and jump around. That's life.

But stupid parents are another matter. Take a Sunday showing of Shrek 2 at a local cineplex. A young woman with a big tattoo above her ass crack had brought four small children to the movie. She got them all those kid meals with the popcorn, drink and candy set out in a cardboard laptop. She had them all seated and the previews were starting when one of the kids announced that she had to go potty. So the woman got all the kids gathered up (responsibly assuming they were too small to stay by themselves) to tromp off to the bathroom.

Now, wouldn't it have made sense to have the kids go to the toilet before the movie started? Doesn't baseline logic hold that it would be easier to get that part of the ritual completed before entering the theater?

Well, they all returned to their seats, reassembled their goodie-laden laptops and resumed talking over the remainder of the previews. Fine.

But about a third of the way into the movie, another kid announced that she had to go. This time, I believe the woman decided to leave the other kids and take just the one.

It became clear at this point that during the first potty break, only the one kid actually went. Why didn't this woman have all the kids evacuate their bladders the first time?

Apparently this kind of thing needs to be taught in high school home ec classes.--Geoff Schumacher