A/E Highlights

Well, he's no Joe Piscopo...thank God

There's no guarantee of comedy success just because you have an "SNL" pedigree. Just ask Tim Kazurinsky. I think he's working the drive-through at the In-N-Out Burger on Sahara. Colin Quinn, on the other hand, has parlayed his fame into an intelligent and hilarious show on Comedy Central, "Tough Crowd." He'll be performing at 8 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. Saturday at the Hollywood Comedy Tour at the Lounge inside the Palms. Tickets are $25. Info 942-7777.

All the Greek babes swoon

Admit it. Before "My Big Fat Greek Wedding--hey, let's make this into a bad TV show," you had no idea where Yanni was from. Now you know. If you want to score points with that little Helen of Troy in accounting, take her to Yanni and pass the butter. He's playing at 8 p.m. Saturday at the Mandalay Bay Events Center. Tickets are $65-$100. Info: 632-7580.

I AM (not) THE LIZARD KING!

Short of going to France and digging up Jim Morrison, this is as close as you're going to get. Peace Frog, a Doors tribute band, performs at 9 p.m. and 11 p.m. Friday and Saturday at the Cannery, 2121 E. Craig Road. Admission is free. Info: 507-5700.

They do music too?

Wow, and here we thought Coheed and Cambria just put out weird comic books. They're playing at 6:15 p.m. Friday at the House of Blues. Tickets are $15.50. Info: 632-7600.

He is the Mac King!

...which, while it doesn't imply the same sort of raw sexuality and danger as the Lizard King, is pretty nifty in itself. Mac King, magician, comic strip character and a guy with an unhealthy fondness for plaid, performs at 1 p.m. and 3 p.m. Tuesday through Saturday at Harrah's. Tickets are $16.95. Info: 369-5111.

Come for the artistry, stay for the--yoiks! Did you see that?

Cirque du Soleil. Topless. Buff midget. 'Nuff Said. Zumanity is at 7:30 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. Friday through Tuesday at New York-New York. Tickets are $65 to $95. Info: 740-6815.

If doughnuts are outlawed, only outlaws will have doughnuts

In his fattest, Lycra-stretching peanut butter and 'nana sandwich days, the King was never this big. Maybe if he had been, he'd still be alive and as huge a star as Peter Vallee, aka Big Elvis. He performs from 3-6 p.m. Tuesday through Friday at the Barbary Coast. Admission is free. Info: 737-7111.