A/E Highlights

Happy Valentine's Day

That Billy Shakespeare sure could write 'em, but by today's standards, The Taming of the Shrew is more than a little creepy. What do you do with a strong, opinionated woman? Bend her over and spank some sense into her. The bard's immortal comedy will be performed by the Utah Shakespeare Festival Touring Company at 8 p.m. Friday and at 2 p.m. and 8 p.m. Saturday at CCSN's Cheyenne Campus at 3200 East Cheyenne Ave. Tickets are $10. Info: 651-5483.

You're fired!

Look, all we're saying is don't open with the Talking Head's "Burning Down the House." Okay, so we're flaming assholes with no sense of propriety. Bob Lentini, audio engineer par excellence and Jeanne Quinn, graphic artist and web designer, lost their house and businesses to a fire. Now some of their clients are putting together a benefit to get them back on their feet. Come see Gordie Brown, Clint Holmes and a host of others perform a three-hour concert and silent auction starting at 10 p.m. Saturday at the Golden Nugget. Free admission. Info: 682-0826.

Really, this is just an excuse to geek out over The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Yes, the actor who will be portraying Ford Prefect in this summer's upcoming blockbuster, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, will be performing at the House of Blues Saturday at 7 p.m. Apparently Mos Def does music as well, but all we want to do is hear him explain why it's vitally important to know where your towel is. Tickets are $30 to $40. Info: 632-7600.

We knew that rubber glove trick wasn't good for the scalp

Remember way back when Howie Mandel used to yank a rubber glove over his head and inflate it with his nostrils until he looked like a Three Mile Island rooster? He had a full head of curly locks back then. We have no idea what caused the "Mr. Clean" earring. He'll be at the MGM Grand through next Thursday, all the shows start at 9 p.m. Tickets are $60. Info: 891-7777.

Sorry, there's nothing we can do about the song that will be running through your head the rest of the day now

The Harlem Globetrotters play at 7 p.m. Wednesday and Thursday the 17th. Tickets are $11.50 to $107. Info: 284-7777.

Finally, a reason to go to Neonopolis

Yes, we've heard all the jokes: There are three stores open and they share a register, they charge for parking to keep the crowds away, Bin Laden is hiding out there because it's more desolate than the caves. Oh wait, those were our jokes. Anyway, if you buy lunch at Jillian's during the week, between 11 a.m. and 4 p.m., you play pool for free. Even we can't mock that. Info: 759-0450.