Nuts and Bolts with Buffalo Jim

Hey Buffalo,

Last week, I woke up several mornings to find the battery dead in my 1992 GMC Yukon. After the second time, I bought a new battery and installed it in the truck. Afterward, it ran perfectly--until two days later when the truck wouldn't start again. I read one of your old columns, which said that a bad alternator could be draining the battery, but I haven't had any problems with the headlights or my sound system while the car is running so I think the charging system is fine. I also looked at the battery cables and they appear to be free of corrosion or dirt. What else could it be?

--H. Schneider

In a perfect world, a new battery would be the solution to every car problem, but we live in a world complicated by wires and circuits and relays and fuses--any of which can go bad and cause your electrical system to go haywire. In other words, bro, a car isn't like a TV remote; you can't just change the batteries and forget about it for the next five years. In fact, I'd say 50 percent of car batteries are changed unnecessarily--either by inexperienced mechanics or overzealous owners.

If your battery is discharged, you should always bring it to a parts store or service center to have it charged and checked. While the battery is out of the car, you should take a second to inspect it for heat cracks and gently clean the battery's surface with a cleaning scrub made of water and a teaspoon of baking soda. If the battery has removable caps, you should also top it off with distilled water. Just be careful not to let any of the baking soda solution seep into the battery because it will neutralize the electrolyte mixture and render it useless. As long as the battery is clean and takes a good charge, it is safe to reinstall it in the vehicle.

In this specific instance, the battery is new, so we can leave it out of consideration. And since the electrical accessories seem to be functioning well, it sounds like the alternator is in good working order. Rather, I would suggest that you have either a malfunctioning interior light or an open relay in the dash--both of which could drain the battery while your truck sits in the driveway. For example, you might have a glove box or trunk light that stays on after you switch off the ignition. Or perhaps more likely, you have a bad circuit in the electrical system that's sucking power while the car sits overnight. The first thing to do is to root around the vehicle and see if you can find a light that's not functioning properly. If it's not that, you'll have to bring it in to a qualified to electrical technician to diagnose and fix the problem. No matter what happens, just don't let anyone change the battery.

Tip of the week: Antennas

A few years back, I was bitching about a broken antenna on one of my cars, and a buddy of mine told me that the people who steal antennas use them as crack pipes. I don't know if that's true, but I still service at least one broken antenna a week in my shop. Most of the antennas in Vegas are power antennas, which are essentially telescoping masts driven by an electric motor. Generally speaking, if you bring one of these to the dealer, they are going to replace the whole unit--motor and all--even if the only thing that's broken is the antenna mast. This is going to cost you at least $150 plus labor, which is a lot for a homemade crack pipe.

Instead, certain mechanics--particularly those of the old-school variety--will just buy a $7 mast and rig it to the existing antenna motor. Sometimes this can take a little doing since many motors are held together by rivets and not screws, but an enterprising shop ought to be able to get in there and save its customers a few dollars. It's still going to run you about $75 in labor, but at least you save the cost of the entire antenna unit. So, before you authorize service on an antenna, make sure your mechanic is only changing out the broken parts and not the perfectly functional parts that simply pad the shop's bottom line.

Buffalo Jim is the owner of Allstate Auto Marine. Although he never met Hunter S. Thompson, he appreciated his work--particularly his coverage of the Mint 500 in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas--and is saddened by Thompson's untimely passing. Buffalo Jim also enjoyed the various films about Thompson's life, but for obvious reasons he was partial to Bill Murray's Where the Buffalo Roam. E-mail him your car questions and/or memorials at buffalojim@lasvegasmercury.com.