Knappster: If these predictions come true, 2005 will be one hell of a year

By George Knapp

Here's a prediction for you. In 2005, vast herds of wandering Angelenos will continue their eastward migration, bringing to Nevada an ever-expanding number of asshole drivers, unskilled workers, tax-hating seniors and real estate speculators. Those tiny pockets of civility that still remain in Las Vegas will be further shredded, the one-finger salute will become the unofficial symbol of the Centennial year, our schools and roads will be packed tighter than a Ball Park weiner and our collective quality of life will continue its nosedive into the crapper.

In the predictions biz, this is what we call a lock.

No one needs a crystal ball to know that rampant growth in Southern Nevada will continue its assault on nearly every aspect of our lives. It's the one prediction we can all agree on, and it's one that local officials seem to accept with open arms. Considering how pervasive the effects of runaway growth are, all other potential developments of the new year pale in comparison. Nonetheless, here are additional predictions, some of which are Locks, some of which are merely Likely and a few of which are Longshots.

Likely: Gov. Kenny Guinn will use his State of the State speech to tout the health of Nevada's economy, and to remind his critics that their doom-and-gloom pronouncements about the big tax package signed into law by Guinn did not destroy the state or cause riots in the streets or send businesses scrambling to get out of Dodge. I doubt the Guv will mention the Review-Journal by name in his speech.

Longshot: Guinn will extend an olive branch to Sen. Bob Beers to see if Beers wants to join the mainstream GOP as a player, or remain on the sidelines and lob hand grenades. The governor might even come up with some sort of mission or project for Beers to head.

Lock: Nevada Power Co. will file a new lawsuit against the Southern Nevada Water Authority, alleging that SNWA participated in a conspiracy to sabotage and take over the power company. Nevada Power's earlier lawsuit was dismissed but the judge said the company is welcome to refile something. It's coming.

Lock: The central figure in the G-Sting political corruption probe, former nightclub owner Mike Galardi, will hook up with a new lawyer in '05 and will ask the feds to consider re-negotiating whatever deal he cut with them in exchange for his testimony. Someone will probably realize that Galardi's story might make for an interesting movie, and initial talks will begin. It's a longshot, but some of the names given to the feds by Galardi, names that have not yet been made public, might just surface in the next 12 months.

Likely: A "Son of G-Sting" probe will be launched. This new investigation of political corruption will not be related to the topless clubs, but will involve several big names in town. Here's a scenario for you--doctors and lawyers, working together on a major, ongoing fraud scheme, but with help from hospital executives and a judge or two, and all centered on a shadowy, shady middle man. Who knows? Maybe FBI agents are already asking questions about such matters.

Likely: A summit will finally be held to focus on the many problems facing Mount Charleston, most of which have been made worse by growth in the valley. (Anyone who was stuck on the mountain on New Year's Day knows what I mean.) Washington bigwig Harry Reid will use his new influence to help the beleaguered residents of Mount Charleston and to preserve the mountain before it is pounded into gravel by the rampaging hordes.

Lock: Once again, the people who run Area 51 will decline to allow Knappster to take a tour of everyone's favorite secret base. Also, mysteryious black triangles will be seen in the skies above Las Vegas, and I sure as hell hope someone gets some video.

Lock: Advocates for wild horses will take off the gloves and launch a tough public relations campaign in opposition to the sneaky manuever that will allow the BLM to sell wild horses to slaughterhouses. Don't be surprised to see a big, celebrity-studded event in Las Vegas early in the year. And when that first truck is loaded with wild horses for a trip to the dog food factory, you can bet there will be plenty of people watching.

Likely: The "More Cops" ballot measure approved by voters will run into trouble at the Legislature. Despite the public's stated desire to pay for more police officers, some anti-tax zealots will fight like crazy to keep this from happening. I'm guessing the Legislature will eventually help this move forward, but it will be a fight. Those who try to stop it are going to going to face some intense scrutiny and tough questions.

Longshot: Someone at the Legislature will insist that there be a public audit of the Las Vegas Monorail project. By all rights, there should be such an audit. Everyone knows what kinds of trouble the monorail experienced last year. Soon enough, plans will be put into motion to pump tens of millions of dollars into other legs of the train, so it only makes sense that there be some public oversight of this troubled project. Attempts to have a public audit during the last Legislature were bitterly opposed by monorail execs. (Wonder why?) Instead, they favored turning over to the Legislature the results of a private audit conducted by...oh, that's right...by themselves. It was pathetic. A bill draft request to have such an audit is on the books in Carson City, but it was requested by Vonne Chowning, who declined to run for re-election. We will have to wait and see whether any lawmaker has the guts to stand up to the well-connected monorail power brokers.

Lock: The push for "graduated driver's licenses" will gain considerable steam at the Legislature in light of several deadly, high-profile accidents involving teenagers since the last time this thing was considered. Sen. Barbara Cegavske will likely be at the forefront, as will Assembly Transportation Committee Chairman John Oceguera.

Likely: Some very big names will enter the nasty legal fight over the ownership of Nevada Beverage, the state's largest beer distributor. Once the results of a court-ordered audit are made public, it's even possible that the ownership of Nevada Beverage will change hands. The new players will not be pushovers, and this story will finally make a splash in national financial circles.

Likely: Federal authorities in Chicago will indict longtime mob boss Joey "The Clown" Lombardo in a wide-ranging assault on the Mafia organization in the Windy City. Information will surface about who ordered the 1986 murder of Las Vegan "Tough Tony" Spilotro, and who carried out the hit.

Longshot: Jessica Williams will win her appeal to the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals and will be set free. Her lawyer, John Watkins, will convince the federal panel that Williams was subjected to double jeopardy.

Likely: Sandy Shaw, who participated in the "show and tell" murders almost 20 years ago, will finally be released on parole. Shaw. who was only 15 when the crime occurred, has served more than half her life behind bars. The Parole Board has given its okay to her eventual release but seems in no hurry to follow through.

Likely: Local businessman-philanthro- pist Robert Bigelow will have a successful launch this fall of his first "space habitat" creation. Bigelow's gamble will put Southern Nevada in the forefront of a new space age.

Longshot: Media interest in Las Vegas will continue to soar, to the point that everyone who lives here will eventually have his own TV show...everyone but me, that is.

Likely: Attorney Dominic Gentile, best known last year for his role in defending Nevada Controller Kathy Augustine during her impeachment proceedings, will expand his horizons and parlay his considerable reputation into something much bigger than a law practice.

Likely: The Greenspun family will invest in something that all of Southern Nevada will be happy to see.

Lock: The area's first Regional Animal Campus will open up to raves, but the folks who run the ambitious shelter will have to take a tough look at the out-of-control growth in the local pitbull population.

Likely: The drought will persist but will ease a bit. That won't matter to water honchos, who will beat the bushes for every thimble-full of water they can beg, borrow or steal. This water won't help current residents whatsoever, but will make it possible for more homes to be built and more people to move here five years from now.

Lock: The blazing-hot punk rock band Green Day will flame out and die in '05. Knappster believes this to be true because of how great Green Day's American Idiot CD was in '04. If an old fart like me could enjoy an album this much, it must mean that these guys are past their prime and are ready for a fall.